The Tale of Sir Edward The Great

Gather Round dear welcome friends,
And you I shall you regale,
With the wondrous recounting
Of Great Sir Edward's tale.

Sir Edward ruled the British Isle,
His might renown over thousands of miles.
His brav'ry and conquests
Were sung in every hall,
Great noblemen revered him
Since they were very small.

And now the wonderful story
Of Sir Edwards mighty tale,
And the hapless myriad victims
That he mightily did impale:

Though merciless and wantonly
He did skewer them through the heart,
Not a single foe of Sir Edward's
Ever wished him to depart!

And though history doth pride itself
With stories of blood and gore,
The curious part of Sir Edwards’s tale
Is that his victims all begged for more.

Perhaps it was his big strong heart,
Perhaps some sorcerers trick,
But if you ask the ones he killed
They’ll say it was his.....
Enchanted stick.


And if ye listeners wish,
To measure Sir Edward's worth,
Measure not his size in length or height,
But in nobility, strength and...girth.

Ye maidens all ablushed,
With pale cheeks turned rosy red,
Don’t fret or try to hide the truth,
Don’t turn away your head.

'Tis fact; ye long for Sir Edward's sword
To slay you, to render you dead,
As you dream sweet dreams
Of Edward the Great
Come visiting in your ....head.

Fear not my friends
this story does not yet end
all ye who listen enwrapped.

For next you shall hear the amazing tale
When "Sir Edwards meets his match."